When my clinician told me that I was going through a phenomenon called retraumatization, something clicked in my brain. It was a satisfying, crisp sound - a little bleak as far as eureka moments go but I suppose that's basically just character development. Every appointment since then I've learnt a bit more about myself and man, … Continue reading Trauma is a scary word & other reflections
Category: Personal
searching for laylat-ul-qadr in myself
We have indeed revealed this (Message) in the Night of Power: And what will explain to thee what the night of power is? The Night of Power is better than a thousand months. Therein come down the angels and the Spirit by Allah's permission, on every errand: Peace!...This until the rise of dawn Quran, 97:1-5 … Continue reading searching for laylat-ul-qadr in myself
assorted thoughts – 12:13am
1. Poetry is no stand in for writing. "Writing has become so salient for you" Tannya said to me one night, and it's true. Poetry is a quick fix, a compulsive act to remedy a dizzy spell. Writing is something deeper, a loosening of the knots after a long day of toil, and to write … Continue reading assorted thoughts – 12:13am
1:55am, saturday
Sometimes I read through my own blog. I read through it with the same compulsiveness with which I attend to my linkedin profile, as if I have something to prove to myself by reacquainting my eyes over and over with my own work, with my accomplishments (or lack thereof, depending on the day), and most importantly, with my … Continue reading 1:55am, saturday
Voulez-vous bhangra avec moi?
I'm a little annoyed, but I'm also a little sad. And this may be elitist, but I'm Lahori. We can get elitist. But no offense meant, I promise! I get invited to a lot of South Asia-related events on campus, and I can say that I have not been to a single one since I … Continue reading Voulez-vous bhangra avec moi?
To write again
There is nothing sadder than the niggling thought that you have a slew of unfinished, barely started drafts. I take that back - it's having a slew of unfinished, barely started drafts across multiple platforms. Medium, WordPress, the five million writing applications on my phone, all with a cute little note on the side telling me … Continue reading To write again
Short note: On family
To study the concept of family in sociology is to approach a many tendril'd institution with a pince-nez that can only see so much at a time. Granted, that can often be all of academia, but with family especially the coldness, the hardness, the brutal honesty that comes with intense study is amplified. Family is … Continue reading Short note: On family
I got off the armchair
My grandfather passed away when I was 14 years old. I may not have been as close to him as my brother was but I’d like to think my dada – Urdu for grandfather – was privy to the moment every star in my figurative sky aligned and made me recognize what I wanted from … Continue reading I got off the armchair
Short note – growth and wanderlust
I always did like that picture. I don't think I was five yet, and certainly not pleased with the idea of having pictures taken of myself but now, 14-15 years on, I'm glad these pictures exist. That's me, in all my thick-pig-tailed glory, in front of my old house in Lahore, a house I … Continue reading Short note – growth and wanderlust
Note to self
You fought so hard to love yourself and found that love in other people. And then your self-love became intertwined with company; a give and take, you gave love and in doing so fell in love with yourself. Slowly. Excruciatingly slowly. It was uphill for the most part, but a rocky terrain nonetheless, and sometimes … Continue reading Note to self
Neiha Lasharie 